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You started out my friend.
I trusted you to be my future.
I knew the truth of myself.
But I also knew you.
You made me laugh.
You also made me cry.
I gave you my body and you hurt it.
I gave you my attentions.
And you ignored what I offered.
You destroyed me.
Beat me, bruised me, spit on me.
I gave you everything, all of me.
You killed me.
Called me names and you played your games.
My mind will always have scars.
Wounds that tore deep into the heart of who I am.
I tried to protect myself.
But you were always faster, stronger.
And you knew you controlled me.
I looked into your eyes for the answer to why.
And saw there was no soul.
My body damaged, my mind and soul taken.
You attacked relentlessly.
Never stopping.
Nothing ever stopped you.
Not tears.
Not screams.
Not begging or pleas.
I learned to be silent.
I learned to acquiesce.
I know Fear.
Tasted it and smelled it, lived in it.
I hate what you did to me.
I hate I couldn't save myself.
I watched myself die.
And I hated you.
I hate you took so much from me.
But in all of this hate,
I have come to realize that in every death,
There is a Rebirth...
And I have come out of the arms of death,
to LIVE.


Written by M. White, September 21, 2000