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I hate that I am a bitter person. That sometimes I let the hurtful things that people I've cared for a lot, brand into my soul. I feel like I've just been a stepping stone in some people's lives. People I cared for- and I must be full of myself that I think my kindness shouldn't be taken for granted.

I use to have this friend that I cared for greatly and worried over when she disappeared for over a year, me believing she may have succeeded in killing herself. Finally she returns and as I've been told- she did try to kill herself, and she was admitted to a facility for a _while_. I was here to welcome her back, and continue to encourage her to continue drawing, art in general and getting better. Lo and behold how much better she's gotten in art..and how she's forgotten all about me.

I waste too much energy and put too much into my relationships with people. I hurt and scar myself unnecessarily. Such a painful character flaw..