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I am alone in a peaceful place. It is peaceful because I've convinced myself it is. It's dark, and chilly, and it smells like wet dirt. Wind is always blowing. It feels like I'm standing on soft, wet grass. It is perpetually dark.
I can convince myself that this is peaceful. I can convince myself that I've been pushed to safety. Endless solitude.
But, there are times when I long for someone. Sometimes they come, but often, they don't. Everyone I love has left. They've been ripped from me. They are pulled from me by their individual parts. Something invisible comes and buries itself within them.
First, it saws off heaps of flesh. The flesh slides away from me. I hear the sound of it dragging on the watery grass.
When my friend is left with only muscle and bones, collapsed and shrieking, it liquefies the organs. The organs, stinking of raw meat, drizzle around the muscles and bones.
My friend is dead. It does nothing with my friend's bones. It has made my friend collapse without touching the bones.
It slithers to me, sheltered within my friend's veins and arteries. I am paralyzed from my agony. It wriggles around my body, and between my lips. Down my nose. It pops the vessels. I begin drowning. I choke on my friend's blood. It slides a vessel into my skull. It released blood around my brain, until the pressure makes me holler for mercy. My friend's blood is everywhere. I am spitting it up as I scream. It is covering my eyes. It is squeezing my brain. It's in my stomach. It's spilled on my arms and torso.
It begins moving my friend's muscles. It uses my friend's blood vessels like puppet strings, to make me look at what it will do. I've seen it already. I know what's coming. I don't need to be reminded
It shreds my friend's muscles, and lays them out. It spells "Your fault, because you cared"

This terror is overwhelming. The hate I feel is like fire, consuming my body.
But I don't want to be alone forever.
It isn't my fault something is killing everyone I love