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My Thoughts Usually when I get depressed...I write. When I get angry...I write. Sad, strange, anything, I write. Except when I'm happy. So, not only is this an effort to get out of my current funk; it is also a chance for me to write everyday.


Len Gray
Community Member
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Sometimes I Wonder...
Does it really seem like I don't have any willpower? Lately I've been getting into a lot of stuff. Stuff I know I shouldn't be doing. It worries me how little independence I have left, much less want to use. I feel like I'm being worn down, forced to wear masks again. I can't stand it. My boyfriend, my grandparents, and even my friends all act like I'm supposed to be there for them all the time and I can't! So...what now? What can I do?
I've given it a lot of thought and eventually decided:

I'm going to help around the house more-I'm tired of being lazy and not taking responsibility for myself. It was cool for a while but its getting old

I'm going to be more careful with my money- Someone wants to see me? They can come to my house or give me gas money. I don't like spending $70 dollars in gas a week when I only get paid $90.

I'm going to try harder in school- This is my career. I don't need to be half-assed.

I'm going to start thinking for myself more- No more weed, no more letting other people dictate how I spend my time. If I wanna do it, that's what I do. Not the other way around.

I might lose friends this way, and maybe I'll end up all alone but...If anyone's reading this, please wish me luck.




 
 
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