you're content & have a job I'm depressed & lack the education
So let me forget about it and lie in bed with you & forget about those dreams, because your shoulder feels so warm & your heart beats so gently I think I can hear my name in it from time to time.”
I dream of false dreams, I find myself believing in the stuff people throw out; love, dreams, hopes, faith, amity, all of it. They fall at my feet asking, wondering if I out of the world could help them. I pick them up as if they were flesh and blood of my own. Finding a spot for each one. Love, I store it in the empty crevasses in my heart that are ever so quiet. Dreams, I throw them upon my shoulders as they creep into my mind and fill me full of these thoughts of affections, goals, fantasy, things I wish where true. A reality all of my own. Hope, it so carelessly flutters its brilliant wings around me constantly telling me to hold on, and never give up on anyone not a soul, but lately it hasn’t been around when I needed it. Faith, oh this foolish little one runs back and forth with me, giving me the lessons of this person and that one, never being clear to me. It’s heart breaking at times, when I have nothing to turn to.. Amity, is my only chance at survival, reaching towards me and keeping me the way I am, no matter the disappointments and let downs.. It holds it light for me.
“Dearest Dear,
There is a butterfly breathing its way out of you. There is a red & blinking button pressed to bear releasing. I am ever so sorry, but still collecting your colors. In the midst of apologies, still pressing your fragile frame to pages; special focus on forever. Tomorrow, I will visit you inside your house. shortly thereafter, I will hide underneath your bed; making a nest of your blankets. The following morning, I will infiltrate breakfast disguised as a warm sip of tea.
That will become my favorite section, in retrospect. the part when you learned to call me "honey", honey. the part where I whispered and tickled your chin.
I hope this letter finds you well:
well worn. well held. well loved.
Well hello, beautiful.
yours sincerely,
la la la-la love “
