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The Rules
1. In order to play the game, one must simply know about the game, and have a basic grasp of the rules. Thus, if you do not wish to become a participant of this simple but unfathomably stupid internet concept ritual right now, simply click the random page button. Beware: This may lead to goatse. If one does not read the rules and thus is not playing and cannot lose he wins.
2. There is no way to win the game, but one can, at any given moment, be winning. However, awareness that one is in fact winning will immediately make the winning person a luser. The reasons for this will now become no clearer. It has been speculated, however, that the game may be won by, after learning of the game, never thinking of it again until your death. If you manage to attain this feat, then you can consider yourself as having won the game. You deserve it, given that your lack of thinking about the game must be a result of Alzheimer's, amnesia, or being a dumb s**t.
3. In order to lose the game, one must simply think about it. You heard right. This means that in order to maintain a certain vague level of success one must know of the game, but not be cogitating it at that moment. This means that by uttering the words "the game" on the internets, or saying them aloud in a public place, you are condemning any present players of the game to a similar loser fate.
4. Optional rule. If a participant does, on their mental travels, briefly remember the fact that they are playing the game, and thus lose, they are obliged to tell anyone nearby that they have just failed in their subconscious attempt to remain victorious. The most common phrase of use in these circumstances is simply "I lost the game."
5. Lesser rule. If anyone loses in the fashion described in rule four because of some a*****e, they have a moral, but not rule-based, responsibility to kick the living s**t out of that person, or resort to any number of handy intarnet slurs, if this takes place OL.
6. A rule that is both optional and lesser. Since the realization that you lost the game can occur several times in rapid succession over the course of a few minutes, you may decide that you do not need to inform everyone else each time you lose the game in the same hour, or whatever. People who follow this rule are known to the game as losers.
7. ????
8. PROFIT!
P.S.: Essentially, by the fact that you have just looked at this page, you instantly lose the game, likewise I just lost the game by writing it.
P.P.S.: A perplexing game. The only winning move is not to play.
 rocket_willing · Sun Sep 07, 2008 @ 04:37am · 0 Comments |
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