A/N: I thank
Lily Turwaithiel from fanfiction.net for the betaread. Thank you so much!
Disclaimer: This characters are not mine but Jk. Rowlings.
Summary: Another Harry/Draco fic. Harry is suicidal. He wants to jump from the Astronomy Tower but there is someone who´s stopping him from jumping. And that is nobody less than Draco Malfoy. A rather dark fic if you ask me.
***
Because I care.
It was late. The sky was completely dark. There where only the stars and the moon left shinning in the eyes of a boy. It was Harry Potter at the Astronomy Tower. He was all alone standing in the window casing with his hands leaning against the walls beside him. He looked down. It was certainly a couple of hundred of meters to the ground from the point he was standing.
Harry wasn’t afraid of dying. Not even a bit. He longed for it. He had longed for it for so long now. Everything and everyone he loved and cared for died in the war against the Dark Lord. Hagrid, Ron, Hermione, Sirius, Lupin, Dumbledore and lots of other people he cared for. He missed them so much. It was painful for him to be still alive while the others where all gone.
He had nothing left living for. He lost everything, even his life. The real Harry Potter died a long time ago. This was a new Harry; a Harry full of darkness, hatred and evil. He didn’t want to live anymore. The world changed so much. Everywhere you looked where traces of a world war: destroyed buildings, burned landscapes, etc. It was just too much for him. All those memories.
Harry breathed slow and swallowed, beating his tears back; tears of joy. Yes, it will be over soon. He just needed to step forwards and the rest will do it itself. Harry looked up at the stars, tears falling down his cheek.
“I can’t do this anymore…” he gasped, looking over the edge.
It started to rain and a bright light crossed his eyes followed by thunder. “Beautiful weather to die in…” Harry stood up, stretching his legs a bit. He had been standing there for hours now, wondering how it would be to
just be gone like the others. Death. Away from the planet. Away from everything.
“I will be there soon... Please forgive me for what I’m going to do. But I just can’t stand this anymore... Please understand.” The rain stopped. A small smile came on Harry’s lips.
Standing straight, ready to jump, Harry breathed in. This was hopefully his last time before the air would be pushed out of his lungs.
“WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU´RE DOING!?” The door was thrown open and Draco Malfoy stormed inside the room, catching Harry from falling just on time. He folded his arms over Harry’s waist pulling him inside again.
They fell to the floor. Malfoy was on top of Harry pushing his arms against the floor and yelling at him, forcing Harry to look at him. But Harry wasn’t listening. He was trying to get Malfoy off of him. Screaming like a mad man, kicking wild with his legs to come loose. But Malfoy was much stronger than Harry was.
“Let me go! Go away! Get off of me! GET OFF!” Harry almost turned red. Tears constantly ran down his face. He still had no clue who it was. Who had held him back from ending his life.
“Answer me you stupid IDIOT!” Malfoy shouted, pushing Harry harder to the floor. Harry stopped screaming after hearing the voice again. His empty and hollow, dark green eyes flew open and looked at Malfoy. Horrified, shocked, full of hatred; but surprised.
“Well?” Malfoy asked a bit calmer now looking at Harry. Harry tried to avoid his look but Malfoy was still on top of him which was making it difficult to avoid. Harry was calming down. Coming back to sense. Breathing
normally and not screaming anymore. He was as silent as usual.
“Still no talking then? Why did you want to jump? Well? Is that easier for you? Look at me Potter!” Malfoy required. Harry looked back at Malfoy. Draco was being serious for once, looking at Harry with worry. “Talk to
me.” He whispered almost. He was coming closer to Harry’s face and breathing against his lips.
Harry’s arms came free and he pushed Malfoy off of him. “You wouldn’t understand Malfoy,” he said calmly.
“Try at least Potter.” Malfoy got up standing in front of Harry, blocking the window. “Is it because you’re lost? Well Potter newsflash…You’re NOT the only one. I lost my father remember?” Malfoy said showing no pain
but from the inside he was broken. He looked at Harry who was leaning against a wall. Malfoy stepped closer. Carefully. Harry looked up straight in Malfoy´s face.
Harry nodded weakly. “I murdered him just like many others. And I’m sick of it Malfoy, from all of this. I can’t take it any longer: living like this, moving on. I can’t! I can’t move on like nothing happened. I lost everything and everyone I cared for and loved. There is nothing left living for, so why I’m still here? Look outside at the day and tell me what you see? Yes the war… You see the war!” Harry kneeled to the floor. “This is just too much for me. But what did you need to look here for?” Harry asked wiping his tears away.
“I was looking for you. I wanted to talk to you. You’ve changed Potter. You changed a lot. And it is killing me to see you like this,” Malfoy spoke calm, telling the truth because he felt like this for ages towards the other
boy especially after the war. He had fallen in love.
“You’re here to kill me because I killed you’re father, aren’t you?” Harry said with a little sparkle in his eyes.
Malfoy shook his head. “No Harry. I’m here to help you. Help you to move on. Help you to find you’re self again. To give you someone else to care and love for.” Draco kneeled in front of Harry and wiped his hair out of his face. He smiled weakly looking at Harry. He carefully leaned forward and kissed Harry on the lips.
Harry slowly closed his eyes. He didn’t pushed Malfoy away. He let the kiss flow over him. It had being a long time since Harry had feeling this good. When the kiss broke the two of them stared at each other. No word was being said for a while.
“Draco?” Harry mumbled and smiled for the very first time since months.
“Did you just call me Harry?” Draco looked up with little stars in his eyes and nodded.
“You just called me Draco...” he said giving a brief kiss.
“Why? Why are you doing all this?” Harry asked.
Draco smiled and wrapped his arms around Harry.
“Because I care…”
~Fin~
