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As I have explained before, my life wasn't very unusual. Nothing weird or bizzare happened to me...ever! I wasn't the hottest girl in school, (god knows I was probably one of the ugliest) and I didn't have loads of cash, ( like my friends thought I did, don't ask why)but I did have the most essential things needed in the human world. My family ment everything to me and I guess you could say life for my was pretty good.

Right now I'm sure you're wondering *why does she keep repeating "was"?*

Well, a few months ago everything in my life went wrong...

It started after my boyfriend dumped me. Ya, I know your probably thinking *Oh god, this is one of those whole "whine about being dumped" stories*, but you're wrong!!! We still agreed to be friends...*like I've never heard that one before!*

Anyway, that's beside the point!!! After the boyfriend thing, ( several weeks after, might I add) I recieved this call from the office at school to go to the front desk to be checked out. Now I don't complain when my parents pick me up early, but it was really weird...they'd never picked me up twenty minutes after getting to school. ( And this was no dentist/doctor call) Mom was waiting for me as I quickly put my school stuff in my locker. We calmly walked outside to the car like it was no big deal. We got in and as we were driving home, mom told me what happened.
My dog had died. "under mysterious cercumstances" were her exact words. My dog had been in fit condition, hadn't suffered anything critical like a bite or wound, and wasn't old enough to have died of old age. Of course we got home and my brother and dad were there and we had a little ceramony for her in the backyard. She was buried and Mom graciously let us stay home from school that day. I cried.

Two weeks after that, my father told us he lost his job and we were forced to move to a new neighborhood. I lost touch with all my old friends and rarely called my old boyfriend.
I wasn't able to make new friends and started having trouble in school. My grades slipped, I got into fights, and my teachers did everything they could to get me sent to the office.

After a month of living like this, I actually began to think things couldn't get any worse. They did.

Because my dad lost his job, both my parents worked full time now, except on mondays when they were able to come home for a few hours, and my brother and I had to ride the bus. We were getting home that day when I noticed police cars and an ambulance parked outside of our house. The police wouldn't let us inside and we were forced to stay at my brothers friend's house. We called my grandparents and they arrived a day later and took us back with them to live in their home. They never told us anything. We went to court and my grandparents gained legal gardianship to us. No one told us anything.

I now had no friends, no home, and no parents.

Life offically sucked for me from then on.

I was transfered to a new school, I did better now since it was the only thing I had to keep my mind off my life. I never did manage to make new friends, but I didn't really care. Life went on as it always does.

At least, until my grandmother died of a heart attack.

I don't even want to waist time going into detail. My brother and I had to attend three funerals. My grandfather later became an alcoholic, my brother suffered from major anerexia, and I fell into a deep state of depression.

That's when I became infatuated with death.

I wanted to die more than anyone I could think of. I wanted to be strong enough to take the very life I had and rid myself of this god forsaken earth. I couldn't.

But I thought I knew how.