oh my gawd my siister iis frxiin annoyiing teh hell outta meeh!! she has no ******** liife soo she has to go throo everybody elses!! especiilly miine!! ii meen wen shes bord she ******** looks att my profiile examiin every lii'l biit ove iit,, reed my journals,, cooments!! WTF!! and tehn she'll hold iit agencdd mee wen ii get mad at her,, soo she culd go tell,, and she laffs wen iim iin trouble,, she'll walk awaii riite wen ii get yelld at and start gettiing hiit!! shes on teh comp all teh ******** tiime,, has no friiends,, and hates everyone at her skol,, even tho shes liike good at everythiing!! and makes me feel liike a worthless blah. she iintrudes on my liife and kant respect my own priivacy,, ii already have to deel wiiff my parents and here she iis makiing iit worse!! iits liike ii have to hiide my liife frum everythiing and everiiwun. ii keep too many secrects wiithiin mee.. one daii iill explode ii swear. ii wiish ii had a famiily that ii culd talk to soo ii culd get adviice,, and tell them teh thiings goiing on iin my liife. but ii kant,, iits alwaiies been that way,, and wen ii was lii'l ii made up stuff. made up that ii had friiends,, wen ii was relly piickd on,, aviiodd,, wuld have giiviin anythiing to be popular at skol. && iid go home,, sayiing ii had a great daii,, && plaiied wiiff friiends. iit was all jst a lii. they dont knoe shiit. they say iim depressd and codependant well ii am,, ii need frieinds and ii need luv,, iits liike all ii have iin teh wourld,, ever siice 6th grade... ii faked everythiing to have iit. ii kan see iit now,, iiffd ii comiittdd suiiciide my parents wuld bee angry rather than curous and sad,, theyd bee furiious wiiff me,, they feel as iif nothiing iis there fault,, iits my own. everythiing iis blamed on me,, ii feel as iif iif ii was neverr a part of thiis wourld than everything wuld have been fiine. iif they saw teh cuts on my wriists,, kumiing frum all diirectiions,,cuts & carves iin randomiized locatiions ove my body,, jst to feel teh paiin,, as iif iim puniishiing myself,, frum all that ii have done,, and everythiing that ii have harmd,, ii shall harm myself iin return. ii wiish ii culd leave everyones liifes forever and wiish ii was nevrr there. iim not pretty,, not smart,, not niice,, not funny. any othrr gurl culd compaiir too me. liike ii thought my whole exiistance was to briing happiiness iinto ppls liives,, apparently not,, iit seem as all ii doo iis darken tehm. ii accually liistend too my parents and liistend to everyword my mom sayd too me,, jst liike a kiid iim asposed to liisten. they knoe exactly what too do to ruiin me. that wuld bee teh end of iit all. ii dont want anywun new,, iid only diie,, obviiously tehy would have no iidea what they diid,, they have no iidea how iimportant he iis to meeh.
ii miiss yew sooooooo much james!!
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