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Really Old Writing: Part One

Remember that moronic English teacher I told you all about?
The one who never read books?
Although the bulk of her class was maybe up of junior-level spelling tests and crossword puzzles, she would occasionally assign us some writing, only to not read it and give us a mark "for completion."

I hated that woman.
At any rate, we had to do little pieces of writing on the various silly stories and films we had to view in class. They were, for some inexplicable reason, called "journals".

These are several that I quite enjoyed writing.


1. The Truman Show
(Yes, I had to write two pieces about this daft film)


Television is one of the most powerful tools of the twenty-first century. It can entertain, inform or educate. When you need up-to-date world information, you can watch the news. If you want to watch a movie-- presto! There are usually dozens playing all the time.

But as with any other tool, it can have a negative side. "The Truman Show", a film starring Jim Carrey, mildly speculates on how television can have negative consequences when entertainment bears a greater value then freedom or life.

The movie follows a man named Truman Burbank. Ever since the moment he was born, his life has been broadcast worldwide on a program called the Truman Show. Hardly a bad thing, right? Well, Truman has had no say in this. He has no idea that his life is televised.

The rather weak and feeble plotline continues, with Truman noticing unusual things--a camera falling from the sky, a glimpse of his supposedly dead father, the fact that his wife has her fingers crossed in their wedding pictures...

All the while, the audience is shown glimpses of the stage crew and director, Christof, as they plan how Truman's life will change next. As Truman realizes the falsity of the world in which he lives, he tries to escape. This culminates in a scene on a miniature fake ocean where he realizes the truth.

Well, the truth is that "The Truman Show" is a dull, disinteresting movie. The concept is somewhat original, but the execution is poor. Truman is so naïve that it's almost painful to watch him stul of the other characters are paper-thin, with only one defining characteristic, and amble blindly through life. Al Marlon, Truman's best friend, is never without a case of beer; Meryl, Truman's wife, is always endorsing products and giving enormous fake smiles.
Add this to the poor camera work and bland soundtrack and you've got a thoroughly average movie. Even the humour is hit-and-miss, a common trait in Jim Carrey's movies.

In short, "The Truman Show" is a concept that never reaches full potential, leaving the viewer wondering "What's the message here?"

Is it that entertainment can destroy lives? That media can change the way people view their world and the people around them? Perhaps. These ideas, however, have been better represented in other movies, like the Michael Moore documentary "Fahrenheit 9/11", which touches down on how governments use media to manipulate and deceive.

You can tell the creators were trying to attract a wider range of audiences, especially skeptics to movies and television shows. The trouble is, when people in the media try to tell you what's wrong with the media, it comes across as hypocritical and ridiculous.

"The Truman Show", as I've said before, never reaches full potential, full tension or even a complete story with satisfying ending. This is a half-baked movie, and won't hold your attention for more then a half hour. Do yourself a favour--unless you're a Jim Carrey fan, don't watch this movie. There are plenty of other speculatory films out there, many of which are better then this.

"The Truman Show" drops in the ratings with a 2 out of 5.

2. The Tomorrow City

Do you remember 'back in the day', when computers were diabolical machines designed to steal our jobs and kill our industries? I don't, but I've seen "I Love Lucy" more then once and I've been told people used to think like that. "The Tomorrow City" takes the evil computer concept one step higher to the point where they not only want to steal our jobs, but also want to kill old people.

If this sounds like the plot of a bad sci-fi novel to you, then you are regrettably correct. The story is cheesy and poorly written novel, which we were given a chapter long excerpt to read from. I'm glad it was only a chapter and not the whole novel, or else I might have needed therapy.

To be blunt (because I'm just so good at being blunt), "Tomorrow City" is an insult to the intelligence of teen readers. The vocabulary is probably at a fifth or sixth grade level, which confuses me somewhat. Why is this being presented in a textbook for considerably older readers?

The story is decidedly simple--a man has invented a computer designed to make city life simpler and easier. It adjusts traffic lights, cleans the streets and checks the water levels.

Caro, the daughter of the inventor, is concerned about the computer's ability to think for itself. It seems to be making choices about who lives and who dies in the city, killing off old people and hobos alike. As if that isn't bad enough, nobody but Caro, her brother and her friends believe it is doing so! Why? Well, prepare yourself for another twist...

Everyone has been hypnotized after receiving subliminal messages from a popular soap opera! Isn't that clever?!?


Well, it looks like "Tomorrow City" has all the elements of a bad sci-fi novel. Let's see...
-Isolated Main Character
-Evil Computer
-Hypnotized Population
- Subliminal Messages

Now all we need is a beautiful, powerful alien princess and we'll be set! Don't you just love clichés?

To end my review, don't read this book. If you can, avoid contact with this book at all costs. It's cheesy, clichéd, boring and has all the literary value of a Pamela Anderson novel.

Don't read "Tomorrow City."
Ever.
It could kill you.
~A public service announcement from W.A.B.B. (Writers against Bad Books) ~