Smetimes I just feel like I don't exist. I try everything to be liked but even my last resort will fail. Yes, my good friends stick by me but sometimes I feel as if I can't care for them like a good friend. Maybe that's why I feel so lonely. There's this void I feel I'm falling into. I just can't seem to register life right now. It's hard to explain but I am at the bottom of that void. I see no light right now, and I don't know why. Friday I felt listless or so I told my friends. I guess right now, I just feel depressed. I am really sad for no reason it seems. My school... well... it's like the people in it can't seem to see me exist. I want so badly to be accepted but I can't. It's is a wall that I can't find the door. To open the door takes someone to see me valuable. My family and friends already have but I can't find one outsider to think that about me. Even this one guy I like at my school- he gave me some signals, I saw them and became really happy, but then it's like he forgot. I feel forgotten, depressed. Once more, I would just like to open that door. But it doesn't seem like it will happen. I realize my heart will become better soon but right now I am lost. I don't fear what's happening it's just I am sad, confused, lost. I will continue to pretend but I know some friends might have already registered it. I just said I felt out of it and they accepted the explanation.
 __Shisuko__11 · Sat Jan 27, 2007 @ 06:23pm · 0 Comments |
