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So today I'm sitting here in my room. I haven't gone out to do any shopping for a few things that I need still before the weekend is out. I need to clean my room up a bit but I'm vegging out instead.

Yesterday was the birthday "party" (not much party to it, just watching movies and playing video games), and I'm glad to say that my plan didn't go at all. The 'annoying guy' never showed up, though now I'm even more aware of the two sides I have.

One side is the sheep, the other is the sheepwolf.. One is timid and the other is not, pretty much.

I realized just now that me making these journal pages is almost like how Roxas did in 358/2 days. I don't know whether that's a good thing or a bad thing. Or if I'm just making a comparison to Roxas because I want to.

At any rate, my mind needs to rest. I want to take a bunch of leave soon, just to sleep, but sadly I'm constrained by mission requirements.

Which means I'll have to take advantage of every chance I get to relax and motivate myself and prepare it for the up-and-coming trials. But at least I know that they're coming. I just hope the other people around me know that too, because when push comes to shove I can only take so much. And it's likely going to be less than what is needed.

It's a good thing I have this to clear out some of the thoughts that might clutter up my head. When unresolved issues tend to clog up in there and set their reminders to "recurring every 3 minutes", it wears me down.

I wish they said this stuff directly to us when I was in BMT or tech school. It would have helped a lot.

But I suppose they get too busy teaching us all this other stuff that we'll probably forget in 10 days to bring up self management skills as well. Figures.

At least I'm learning it now. Heck, one year down the road is better than learning it 10 years down the road. This is what I wanted.

Maybe I'm more like Saïx. That would make sense.

Ugh, I hate Kingdom Hearts for making such identifiable characters. I need to remember that the important thing about the ones that I keep associating with are not me, but are like me in some ways.

That being said, I need to get a few things done today. So ciao for now!