So, along with my 20 million problems and bullshit in life, my father decides to come home. T.T
I guess it's literally killing me. I've had a migrane since last thursday and even the perscribed medications arent working. UGH.
Enough complaining...
Something happened today that really threw me for a loop.
David asked me to prom.
I truly didn't see it coming.
I was like 98% convinced I'd be going alone and being all depressed.
I dont exactly know why he chose to ask me but, I'm so happy he did.
For some reason I feel as though he's beginning to open up that door again.
The one that lets it be ok for us to care for eachother again.
Suddenly, the world doesn't seem so dark anymore, like I have something to look foreward to.
Sadly, for the past few months, I've been plagued with vivid dreams of my own suicide, the other night I awoke to find myself with knife in hand just hovering over my kitchen sink. I wish I knew why it happened. To be honest, it scared the s**t out of me.
Maybe, now, since I have something to look foreward to in my future, again, these terrible dreams will stop and my midnight contemplations of death with be a part of my dark past.
All I can say for now is that there IS a light at the end of the tunnel and I will diligently wait for it to find its way to me again to light my way to sanity and happiness.
PriestessNaiomicana Community Member |
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