Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

You know what the worst thing you could get called by my Dad was when we were growing up? Well, it's still the worst thing you can get called by my Dad.

Chickenshit.

If you're a chickenshit, you're a coward, you're worthless, you're weak willed and unable to stand up for what you believe. Telling us we were being a chickenshit was a sure way to get us to do what we needed to do. None of us wanted to be that. None of us could stand to be labeled as such by someone like our Dad.

My Daddy didn't raise cowards. All three of us are strong, honest, hard working and will stand to the end for what we love and believe in.

You, boy.....you are a chickenshit. You are the living embodiment of a worthless, chickenshit coward. You ain't even a man. You're a boy. A weak, silly, worthless boy that can't bring himself to be honest with the ones he claims to love. It would have taken mere moments to send and email or message telling me what the hell is going on. I wasn't even important enough for that....I didn't matter enough for even a few moments of your precious time.

You were always telling me what love is. It's not random and it's not cautious and blah blah blah.....

Well, let me tell you something, chickenshit. Love may not be random and it may not be cautious but it is strong and joyous and it will lift you up out of your darkest and deepest hole. It will help you through your worst times, it will keep you afloat in the wildest and deepest of waters.

But love is also nerve wracking. It's worrying and caring so much for someone that you put the one you love ahead of yourself in all things.

At this point, I don't think you'll ever be able to love someone like that.

You sure as hell don't deserve to be loved like that. Not how you are now.

So you run. You just go ahead and run and hide you little chickenshit b*****d.

Maybe someday you will stand up and be a man. You will treat the ones you say you love in the manner in which they deserve to be treated. You will tell them what's going on, you will let them into your life and heart and you will not desert them at the first sign of trouble. When the road gets bumpy, that's when you let the ones you love help you out. You don't fall off the face of the ******** earth and leave them hurt and shattered at your disappearance

Losing you won't break me. Losing you won't shatter me. Losing you won't destroy me.

I am stronger than you will ever be.