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I'll write about whatever I want. Usually I will have deep, insightful writes, but don't count on anything, I might let cha' down. ;)
"I'm Sorry" nobody's listening...
I wrote two songs. I'll post the one I wrote for Charlie though...


I'm Sorry

I'm sorry
I swear I didn't mean
Oh
I'm sorry
There's so much to forgive
Let's go back now
Go back now
To the place we were before
I know that I've lost my way
And I'm sorry

I'm sorry
I know you forgive me
You speak to me
Like I stand without a sin
Oh
The flood is here
Oh God! Am I forgiven yet?

I'm sorry
I swear I didn't mean
Oh
I'm sorry
There's so much to forgive
Let's go back now
Go back now
To the place we were before
I know that I've lost my way
And I'm sorry

I know that you
Will not hold this against me
I know that I am
Pure in your eyes
But my innocence
Can only be skin deep
I know myself
Better than you do...
God forgive me!

Oh...

I'm sorry
I swear I didn't mean
Oh I'm sorry
There's so much to forgive
Let's go back now
Go back now
To the place we were before
I know that I've lost my way
And I'm sorry...



Charlie forgave me. Of course. We're fine. But I still feel terrible. Everyone just turned against me today. Including myself, though I am defensive about one thing.

They started to judge my cursing.

I know I used to be the good little Mormon girl and not curse. And I was very careful at first not to use it around people. But when it did slip out for the first time, they didn't mind at all. They gave me the green light, and now they're turning on me for it. God! They don't know half the story. They don't know what's going on in my life right now!

My best friend is bisexual! I'm bisexual, and Mormon! Do they even know how ******** hard that is? Do they even know how [********] hard it is just to be Mormon?! And you know what, Mormons are ******** jerks. Its true. I believe in a lot of the Mormon teachings and all, but the people are just corrupt now! Since when did it say to brainwash their kids. And I would like to see and exact reference that homosexuality is a sin! Who are they to judge? I hate it! They don't know what its like! You can't help the way you feel!

Why is no one supportive of me in anything? My mom and just about all the people I used to feel close too are ******** homophobes! I can't tell them anything! I have my brother, who is pretty much asexual, so I can't ******** talk to him either, plus he's not really the sensitive type.

My best friend/crush is ******** shunning me and I don't know why!

God! Since when was it me against the world?! I can't talk to anyone anymore! Everyone I thought I could count on has let me down! And for one reason or another, I'm silent. I can't talk about it and I don't know why! I can never explain what's wrong with my life.

Maybe I think I've sinned or something. Maybe I've grown. Maybe I've learned to turn the other cheek. Maybe I just don't give a damn anymore. Maybe I'm sick of crying. I don't know!

All I know is that I'm not truly happy.

My happiness is only skin deep. There's a depression inside. I'm not happy.

God! Is anyone even listening?!


-havi






User Comments: [1] [add]
kathy pan
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Thu Oct 16, 2008 @ 04:45am
i'm here.
and listening.
i'm sorry for being ignorant. : F
best friend/crush?
please, vent more on me, if you have to.
talk to me via message.


User Comments: [1] [add]
 
 
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