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It is time for something different.
My head swims in familiar unfriendly waters these days, and thoughts tumble over and over each other in an all too common, hectic pattern.
I am told I am creative and refreshing but my eyes feel stagnant from the same daily routine, and my fingertips feel lifeless.
It is not often I tell about myself
I have all the time in the world at my command, but I feel it is being taken from me right beneathe my nose by a thief that I cannot catch.
Have I wasted my time by just trying to be happy? I feel like it.
I am not sure where this all could go.
I am told I am loved on more than a daily basis, but why do I feel so isolated and alone.
I feel confined to my head, I feel cold to everyone, I feel like I am rotting from the inside and that no one can see it.
What happened to me
I do not know if this is who I am or if it something I am hiding myself with.
I do not know if I could find myself again if I feel this lost to the world.
I do not know if the world made me this way.
I feel tired everyday
I sleep more and more everyday but I cannot seem to break my exhaustion.
I do not know if its my body trying to tell me that that is where I belong or if it is just a simple diet conflict, but I cannot seem to keep telling myself it is my body wanting me to stay there.
But, I think I can push on