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Liz: Where is the spoon?
Dad: *points unhelpfully to the center of the table*
Mom: *hands the spoon to liz*
Liz: dad y'know that was pretty unhelpful
Alvah: what...? the point?
Dad: At least you know i have a point
Alvah: Ya right, your about as sharp as a spoon....oooooohhhhhhhh
Liz confused ???? Im not related
Dad: awww i was hoping you'd at least say a butterknife
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Dad: my car doesn't idle so while your driving you might stall when you stop
Liz: One way to fix that
Dad: um...i don't think i wanna ask but what?
Liz: Gun the engine full throttle when you see a stop sign..im in a bad mood
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AT SIX FLAGS:

Ticket lady: may i see your ticket
Dad:Welcome to Walmart *big smile*
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Notes from past experiences:

Regular bungee cords are not what you use for bungee jumping
Dont sleep on 7ft tall van....unless you have a deathwish
If you cant see, you shouldn't be stearing a car
If someone is pointing a crossbow at them...don't think they're just joking
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Fortune cookies:

Alvah: Mine says That I am going to get an unexpected surprise
All Three of us: *throw our straw wrappers at him*
Alvah: Thanks guys...i don't think that was what it ment



Well thats life and this is Wallgreens