Last night the most interesting thing happened.
Someone threw out a million dollars.
Yesterday was the first day of the monopoly game. The game is pretty much self-explanitory. After all, Monopoly is a cultural icon. Alas, it's an American cultural icon, and this isn't America- it's Queens. One lucky customer peeled the Monopoly label off of his box of fries, detached the stickers, and presented me with the naked label, a look of triumph on his face. "I Win," he declared, tapping the blank label. The useless paper encouraged the player to collect the stickers and win.
"That's great!" I agreed with mild enthusiasm. "Where are the stickers?"
"I threw them away." He replied. I might have asked him where his used napkins were.
"Well, you shouldn't have done that." I said diplomatically. I tapped the label which once contained his 'winning' stickers. "This is useless."
"No," he insisted. "I won." He directed my attention to the instruction sheet, which contained a chart on which you could attach your collected stickers. I nodded encouragingly, instructing him to stick the stickers on the chart. "You do NOT," I emphasized, "throw them away."
After finally convincing the man that he was not a millionaire, I waited until I was sure this Darwinian nightmare had his back turned (he was busy poring over the collector's sheet) to allow myself a silent giggle. Do you have any idea how hard it is not to laugh in these folks' faces?
"Why you laughing?" My manager asked in his usual stern parental tone. I explained the story of the missing million to him. The manager's laughter followed Sticker Boy out of the store.
And THAT is my Epic Fail of the week.
When I run things, I will laugh whenever I damn well please.
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