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well i just came back from the funeral and well i wasnt sad since i accepted my

grandmas fate but i was sad cause of my family..well i saw dat my uncle was sad

so i went to where he was to try to cheer him up...and well...*sigh* i asked him

about his daughter and he was like yea she is growing up and then just left me out

to dry and walked to a different area...and then..when i tried to say goodbye to my

other uncle he only gave me a handshake..wat type of goodbye is dat? and dat is

not all i had seen him at the mall before anyone in my family was sick or was

dieing and he tried to avoid me as much as possible.. crying im not wanted..i always

felt like that as a kid..that they never loved me..but now it truely shows like ALOT!!

it just shows how much im loved..i still cant help but cry anyways...i want a family

that loves me and that would like show affection..but here its not like that at all...its

like oh no she is there quick dont make eye contact and hopefully she will leave us

alone.. crying then in all the movies with like a family and they all love each othere

and stuff...it makes me cry..the only family i got is my friends :3 and for that i am

grateful i love them and without them i would of died along time ago...so thank u

my friends and even though i haved losted contact with alot of them they are never

out of my heart..i always think about them and hope they are alright :3 *hugs

them all* i love all of u guys and thank u for being there for me