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Shadow of my Past
I saw him today.
It was so strange. So unexpected. Like a dream I always had, something that could only exist as a dream. I thought it was that way.
In one second my entire life changed. Why?
Because I knew he was ok. He hates me, he wished death and revenge upon me...yet I am over run with the joy of just knowing he is alright.
He has moved on, he has forgotten. I am nothing but an akward memory full of disgust.
...and I can live with that.
I can smile when I look at myself in the mirror, I can laugh outloud for no reason and run around like an adreline pumped school girl all for him.
Silly though, he doesn't even know it.
When I said my final good bye, he thought I hated him. He thought I wanted him to go.
Silly kid...
You should have seen the expression on my face when the emblem of "Signum_Crusix" appeared on screen. I froze. My mind went blank. Anyone could name their guild that dumb thing he did...but the emblem, no, that could not be mistakened. That is to likely of a councidence.
The girl, she looked normal. An ugly hairstyle, a plain little mage in Payon. Though she bore pink hair, just like me...
What would of brought me to Payon the same moment a member of that guild was there? ...my armor broke in WoE, this stupid Rogue girl backstabbed me to death so I was going to fix it. I was in Umbala when I was instructed where to go to see the repair man. I ran for my life till I reached Comodo since Umbala doesn't have warps. I almost died at the entrance from the cave, and evil rock this was trying to kill me but after spamming 30 or so potions I made it in alive. I teled to Kafra, and went to Morroc. I saw Isaac's merchant sitting in the same place he's been all week, I shook my head and felt sorry for him. When I walked to the Morroc Kafra, I must of misclicked or something...and was sent to Payon. It was there I recalled the repairman by the weapons shop and walked to him, paying a hefty 5k fee I was going to bwing back to Commodo since I had been wise enough to save there. I concidered sniping GG's for a moment, so walked to get my crystal arrows.
And there she was. The plain mage. Walking about confusing with the retarded symbol of the guild she represent shining "proudly".
I wanted to say something...I wanted to so badly. I wanted to ask how he was. I wanted to know if he was alright. I wanted to know if he would talk to me. I wanted to know so many thing...and she walked on confused, so I watched her from a distance.
I smiled inside. Knowing he was alright if he remade his guild. That was probably Laura or some other girl he suckered into liking him. Maybe it was even him pretending to be a girl since they are often given more free items? I don't know, and I never will know.
I didn't message her. Shadow is ok now. I won't disrupt this balance he has found in a life without me. I just pray he is ok, pray he is safe and sound...although I know he is, us biracial kids know how to survive. 3nodding
I bwinged back to Commodo. I have a new light in my life. I care again, I smile, I laughed for a long time for no reason. I am ready to remake friends, and help my old ones. Everything will be ok, and I will not lose hope this time.
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