This part two, or a continuation, of a journal entry I have already posted. Click here to see that post.
This is regarding a very close friend of mine. A friend so close, I actually consider her to be like a sister. As a recap, 2 years ago, I had to cut her from my life because of an insecure relationship with a girlfriend. I later broke up with that girlfriend and was welcomed back into the friends life, with open arms. I felt so bad about my decision and felt like I deserved something of equal treatment, to even the odds. Sure enough, her boyfriend had the same view of me that my ex did for her. I am an apparent threat to the relationship.
I mean no harm to him, to her or their relationship. I have absolutely 0 phsyical attraction to my friend. I do not feel for her in anyway that would reflect a girlfriend/boyfriend type of relationship. I simply love her as if she were my own family.
As stated in my last post, I was affraid she would take the same course that I did. To this day, that is the single most painful and regretable choice I have ever made. I've made a lot of painful choices in my life, but (to put it simply) I've regretted this choice every single day since I made it.
So this past week, I built up the courage to ask her what she would do. I asked her if she would make the same choice as me. She's been having some problems with him lately, partially because of me talking to her but largely because of the things he does that he doesn't realise are similar to what she's doing. They fight a lot about who he hangs out with beacuse she talks to me. I'm sure he's just affraid of losing her...
Anyways, I asked her straight up if she'd leave me behind and she said probably not. She says she's more the type to stick to her guns and fight it out. She definately takes me as the type. We spent a lot of time sharing our little life dilema's and in general helping eachother out.
She was actually quite distraught the other day and had a mini-breakdown at work. Since we work in the same building, I took an early break and met up with her to try to cheer her up a bit, which ending with a hug.
I'm quite an affectionate person and giving and recieving hugs is a very big thing to me. So needless to say I was kind of quite happy to give her a hug. I was also happy to learn that she likes giving them too. That lifting a big weight of doubt off my shoulders. In short, we hug now. Our little curved relationship has come a long way from minor MSN conversations 3 years ago. As a matter of fact, I'm quite confident that no matter what comes of this, we'll always be in eachother lives, one way or another.
Atleast, for now.
Stone Temple Creep Community Member 
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