I don't know what to say...
If you want to know what I think, I can't believe I'm about to say this...
But I feel that you still want to be ONLY be his friend and maybe somewhere in your mind, you think that Kilas or #10 is trying to be more than a friend. That thought is probably causing you to hate him or either you just want #10 caring about you...
That's the general thought I have about your entry.
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