• dont worry.
    I'm not going to call you and cry anymore.
    listening to the sounds of your resistance
    until my optimism and desperation run dry
    leaving me facing four bland walls of hopelessness.

    I am forced to watch the world opening up before your hungry eyes.

    stop hiding
    you won't find me on your doorstep
    with tears in my eyes and a blubbering mouth
    so spell out your contadictions again
    mabey this time I'll understand
    you want me but you don't
    you need me but you can't
    you miss me but sometimes you forget to.

    Your shaky voice, bursting with grief and regret, forces me
    to wait for something that will never come back.

    You.

    stop talking
    you've made you opinions clear
    and the realization that there is
    nothing
    I can do
    leaves me cold and caged.
    I pace around my mind
    looking for alternatives
    and find only two
    break down
    or
    break you away
    fight for it or let go
    because you wont fight for me anymore
    and my dignity is ticking away
    the time bomb that keeps
    my fingers from the telephone
    and my feet from following the well-worn path
    to your house.
    I feel cold and alone and small
    you detach yourself through your unawareness.

    I call you
    craving closeure
    and you force hope into my exhausted mind
    and between clenched fists
    then walk away without looking back.
    What am I suppose to do with it?
    I am locked in place
    unable to disconnect
    stuck in you waver between rejection and dedication
    trapped in your hesitation forever

    My heart is caught between beat and break.