How Do I know...

• Artist: NiNaBaBaY
• Description: Well This was wrote really fast, I thought It was pretty good For getting done in only 4 minutes besides checking for errors. This Is Whats going through my head at time moment. So I would really like some feed back So come on people COMMENT or VOTE. Thank you much.
• Date: 11/23/2008
• Tags: know torn feel

Once upon a midnight moon,
I laid awake to think things through.
I’ve always been known to be true,
Now my world has turned blue.
It’s like I don’t know what to do.
Do I stay or do I go,
How am I supposed to know.
My mind hurts, my hearts torn,
Do I know he loves me for sure?
If I’m wrong and leave for good,
I do I know I took the right turn?
All These up and all these downs,
I’m so tired and worn out.
If I choose to stay,
Will I always feel this way?

heart Nicole.

Comments

[Ketsuyin]

This is okay, but i see a few areas that could use improvement.

1. There are a few areas where your grammar is incorrect.
2. Sometimes you mix up the ryhme scheme.
3. The verses can be predictable and a little boring, but maybe that's just because i read a lot of poetry.

All in all not bad. 3/5