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Finding Home
Chapter 1
tab The alarm clock goes off at 5:00AM. It beeps twice before Nick's fist slams down on it, silencing its irritating alarm. He gets up slowly, not bothering to turn on the lights. He yawns, still not fully awake. He has been up until 3:00AM, thinking about that dreadful night thirteen years ago. As a result, he hadn't gotten much sleep. Silently, he gets up and puts on his clothes for the day--a plain white shirt and a pair of jeans. He goes to the bathroom, brushes his teeth, and looks into the mirror. Sorrow shows plainly on his face. He sighs as he ties back his shoulder-length brown hair and puts on his glasses. He then walks down the stairs and into the kitchen, where his sister Carla is eating a piece of toast. She looks up at him, Beaming.
tab "Good morning!" she says in a voice as musical as bells, "Aren't you excited about the first day of school?"
tab "Of course not," he replies, "Why should I be?"
tab "Isn't it obvious?" she asks with a sly smile, "Now that summers over, you'll get to see Melissa every day."
tab "You have a point," he says, a smile growing on his lips. His girlfriend, Melissa, Had been away all summer, and he had been looking forward to seeing her again. She's the only person he can really be himself around. He feels he can tell her everything. She's also the only reason he hadn't escaped yet.
tab Carla looks at the clock. "Damon's still not up yet?" she frowns, "We have to go soon. I'll go wake him up."
tab Nick watches as she bounds up the stairs, her golden-blond hair trailing behind her.
tab With Carla gone, his thoughts trail back to Melissa. Sweet Melissa. Darling Melissa. Kind Melissa, with a voice like a choir of angels. Beautiful Melissa, with brown hair that cascades down her back like a majestic waterfall. Fragile Melissa, with eyes like precious peridot, full of love whenever her gaze is on him. He had planned to escape when he was in eighth grade, but then he met Melissa, and after that, he couldn't bear to leave her.
tab But now it was getting to be too late, he had waited too long. Yet still the thought of leaving Melissa, of abandoning his precious Melissa, made his heart ache. But if he stayed, death would surely be waiting not only for him, but for Carla and Damon as well. Finally, he makes his decision. By the end of the first semester--nay, by the end of the first month--he will escape with Carla and Damon. As for Melissa, he will have to tell her everything that he had kept hidden from her--from everyone--about the truth, about his plans to escape, and why he hadn't escaped yet.
tab As he ponders how he will reveal the truth to his siblings, Carla bounds down the stairs. Walking behind her is Damon, who runs a hand through his messy blond hair and yawns.
tab "I hate this," he mumbles, "It's too early."
tab "Welcome to high school," Nick tells him with a slight smile, "You'll have to wake up this early every day now."
tab Damon groans as he picks up a piece of toast. "Just shoot me now." he complains.
tab Nick laughs and, feeling a rare moment of happiness, he walks out of the big house with his brother and sister following close behind.
- by anna banana panda |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 07/02/2010 |
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- Title: Finding Home - Chapter 1
- Artist: anna banana panda
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Description:
So yeah, this is Chapter 1 of Finding Home (sorry, the title was thought up last minute...) Anyway, chp 1 focuses around the same 3 kids from the prologue, except it is 13 years later.
If this confuses you, then read the prologue. It is sort of necessary for comprehension in this story. If you have read it and you are still confused, then dont worry, it should make more sense as i post the other chapters.
Anyway, PLEASE comment
I get discouraged from writing when people dont comment - Date: 07/02/2010
- Tags: finding home chapter demons kidnapped
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Comments (3 Comments)
- Morbid Humour - 07/05/2010
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My favourite - I'm Canadian, so I'll spell favourite any damn way I please - part of your story is the "Sweet Melissa, Darling Melissa" bit.
I love your style and would be interested in reviewing your future works. ^^ - Report As Spam
- Morbid Humour - 07/05/2010
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On to your story:
I love it so far. However, small errors in grammar and formatting really do subtract from it. If you fix a few of these, the reader won't be distracted from the really great story you have here.
"She looks up at him, Beaming." - the 'beaming' should be uncapitalized.
"His girlfriend, Melissa, Had been-" - same with 'had'. - Report As Spam
- Morbid Humour - 07/05/2010
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Ditto about the commenting thing. I totally get where you're coming from. ;D
Luckily, I'm someone who devotes their time to commenting. Not to advertise or anything, but if you want feedback on anything else, here's my link: http://www.gaiaonline.com/arena/writing/non-fiction/vote/?entry_id=102218971#title - Report As Spam