-
The suns light was just starting to shine over the mountain tops. The many hues in the sky made the morning look glorious. The birds where singing and the dew sparkled. The temperature was perfect and the small village seemed serene. Yet all was not well. For a dark force was moving across the land and this village was next. Children woke up and wnet out to play as the village men began their daily jobs. It was another ussual morning until the alarm was sounded rung. A rider on a draft horse came down the hills yelling about a force of black horses and black robed men.
The woman grabbed their children and ran inside as the men armed them selves. But one child was unaccounted for. It was a little girl of about 6 who was in the forest getting flowers. She had no idea what was about to happen to her village. Her dark brown hair shined softly and her blue eyes glittered as she spotted a daffodil. Then screams reached her ears and she looked up in firght. There above the trees was smoke and the familiar voice of her grandma calling her reached her ears. The girl ran to the egde of the forest and stopped dead in her tracks. That is where she stood watching the massacre of her village.
The horses and men where like a black wave moving over the village. The girl cried out and was about to run when she saw he grandma get slain. The girl fell to her knees and broke down in tears as she watched the last of her village go up in lames. She looked up at the red moon with fury in her heart that could not be quelled. "I vow on all the stars in heaven and on the moon to get my revenge!" She yelled intot he night. Light began to build at her feet and engulf her. Her hair became long and silver as her skin turned so deathly pale it was whiter than snow. She grew from a 6 year old to a full blown 16 year old in seconds.
She wore a black tight leather dress that went to her ankles. Her eyes turned to a bright unsettling green and they reflected her fury and her power. The light engulfed her fully and then it was gone. She stood there glowing slightly in the night. "My name is Sorrow and I will avenge my village." Sorrow moved like a mist threw the forest. She soon spotted the black force and stopped in front of them. The one leading them called a halt when he saw her. "Move or die." He said in a powerful voice. Sorrow held her head high and stared him in the eyes.
"I am Sorrow. I am here to pas jugdement on you!" She said coldly. The man laughed and so did the rest of the force. "A spirit judge us? We are not fools, you can not harm us." A smirk played on sorrows lips. "Who ever said I was a spirit?" She held out her hand and felt the power flow threw her. "The judgement for slaughtering my village is guilty!" The man laughed and then was suddenly he was on his back, off his horse, and with a hole in his chest.
"Judgement day is here." The others tried to run but where cut off by a black fire that surrounded them. "No one survives." The fire engulfed them and their screams made her heart ache but she had to do it. When it was over the ground was scorched and Sorrow fell to her knees. She looked up at the sky and screamed in loss and grief. She would never smile again.
- by Dragon_of_Eternal_light |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 03/25/2009 |
- Skip
- Title: Short story
- Artist: Dragon_of_Eternal_light
- Description: I got bored and decided to just go ahead and put only part of the book I'm writting in real life on here. My freind Marissa went over it and showed me what I needed to fix so here is the fixed part. If you would like to read more just tell me n comments or PM me and I will send it. This is only part of Chapter 1.
- Date: 03/25/2009
- Tags: short story
- Report Post
Comments (3 Comments)
- JHaley - 04/02/2009
- Inability to produce something at a certain time and speed seems to trouble the majority of the world. But, I digress. Anyhow, I noticed several mistakes in this story. But I haven't got the time or space to mention them, so I'll be quick and straightforward about this: It's good, but needs work.
- Report As Spam
- Dragon_of_Eternal_light - 03/27/2009
- It's not actually going to be published. Just going to be something for my friends to read. In fact I can't produce the chapters fast enough for them. o.o;;; It's really annoying.
- Report As Spam
- Future in Chaos - 03/25/2009
- I wouldn't read this book. Instead of just saying "the man laughed and then was suddenly he was on his back, off his horse, with a hole in his chest." It would sound nicer if you wrote something like: " There was a flash of light and he lay on the musty ground, a trace of his last laugh still lingering on his face, his soul now with those who would never rest in peace." Just thought it would sound cooler. But it is ok writing.
- Report As Spam